Stop topical steroid abuse!

Saturday, March 31, 2012

You know that the sh** has hit the fan, when a complete stranger tells you they are going to pray for you! Day 22 on GAPS

I can't believe a perfect stranger told me today that she was going to pray for Kline and I! How nice, are we really that much of a mess? Ah, yes!!!!! We were at a consignment shop with lots of breakable things, when Kline decided to run around like crazy and get over heated.what should a little boy with very itchy skin do when he gets over heated and itchy, well, apparently Kline thought it was best to strip down to his birthday suit right there in the store! Then, when I wanted him to put his clothes on ( like the very terrible mother that I am)he threw a massive tantrum!

And then, so did I!

I guess, since my son was itching like crazy and naked, you could see all of his scabs and rashes....a woman came over and started talking to me. Offered advice on her dr. To see, which funny enough, the dr. Is already kline's allergist. And then after I wrestled Kline to the car and went back inside to settle up, she came up to me and told me, she was going to pray that things get better for us. I sure hope she is better at praying than I am, maybe she can get the big guy or gal to listen! ;-)

We got to try avocado today, Kline was so happy, you would have thought I had given him a huge piece of cake! In 3days we r trying coconut yogurt, to see if the fiber will help us poo!!! Can't wait!!!!

Xoox Loren

Friday, March 30, 2012

Day 21..... I am diagnosing myself with turrets!


Day 21... I am diagnosing myself with turrets!!!

So, I have always talked like a sailor! But since gaps intro started I have now diagnosed myself with turrets! Self diagnose but still...I fucking cuss all of the time. I used to be suck a fucking goodie two shoe that when at 13, my mother allowed me to start using bad words, I just went with it! It was the one thing I could do that wasn't bad! God forbid I have sex early or drink anything other than a wine cooler, and that was in senior year. So, when my very stricter mother gave me the green light to use curse words, I ran with it and never looked back! I think because I am such a fucking prude that it feels so good to cuss! So, refreshing, such a release.

Well, since I started intro 21 days ago, I have never cussed so much...I've even gottin' I. Trouble on a family facebook site, ;-)! When I go into to my 2 year old like tantrums, I have so many Nasty words coming out of my mouth, I swear I have turrets! Shit, damn, fuck! Oops, sorry, see what I mean!

I absolutely know I I will be the mom getting called in at kline's school to talk about his bad language, and unfortunately my husband will get the absolute please in saying...." guess who he got that from, I told you were going to warp him, Loren!!!!"


So, he is a very cute and funny and disturbing to some people , Kline story!

We were skiing a few weeks ago at Squaw valley and I took Kline on something way to hard for him! So, I was super stressed and I was, you guessed it, cussing! I believe I sounded a little something like this,

"Shit, mother fucker, this was a crap ass idea!!, this is killing my mother fucking back! What the hell was I thinking!".

Kline handled it much better than I did!!! So, I finally cussed ourselves to the bottom
And Kline Response was

" SHIT!"

and because I am such a good mother I said,

" oh, honey you aren't allowed to say shit!"

And he said,
" I say shit a little bit mommy!"

And so we came to an agreement, he can say shit a little bit, when a little shit is the best thing to say!

Man, do I love my kid.....the apples doesn't fall far from the tree!


Ps,Sorry, I am not trying to make fun of anyone with turrets, as I know it is not a funny disease!

Have a fuck in' kick ass night! Loren
Xoxoxoo

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

OK, maybe there Is a god!




I have had so many friends, family members and complete strangers show there support since my last atheist post! ;) I guess there is someone out there looking after us, sending us love and healing thoughts!

Thank you all for the support, I was in a very dark space yesterday, ah, hell, the last 17 days! This still really sucks the big one, but it is nice to know how many people care about Kline, Denny and I!


So, no we are not on full gaps, we are on stage 2.... I think I am going to try to bring in more veggies baked to help with our constipation......stage 1 was miserable, let's hope stage 2 doesn't kill us! If we can start shittin' I think our detox would be much less intense, at least I hope!

Today, I lost my shit in front of Kline, yet again! Actually at least 2x's!!! My little peanut was so sweet. He tried playing music for me on his tamboreen, tried to make me laugh, and even asked me to pick him up so he could wipe away my tears! I wish I was always so compassionate to him at 3 in the morning. Don't get me wrong, he can be a total shit sometimes, but deep down inside, under all of his oozing, itchy, burning, scaly, scabbed and scarred skin, he is an angel! I just want to give a shout out to god for giving me Kline! Yes, I may dislike you god sometimes, but over all as Anne frank said, "despite of everything, I still believe the world is good!" (don't quote me on that! Have read or acted that play out in years!!)

I hope one day that he will not need to sooth his mama and make things all better for me. That is NOT his job!!!! That is my job, and hopefully I can completely fulfill it.

THank you all,
In complete ahhhhhhhh, Loren

Sunday, March 25, 2012

God are you listening, or did I do something to piss you off?

Seeing your baby suffer all day long has to be one of the hardest things in the world. Trying everything under the sun to help and fix him when none of it seems to help and only makes it worse, make you feel like absolute shit! Taking him to dr. after dr. to try and fix him and they don't, it's so frustrating! My poor baby actually believes that he can't be fixed! " you can't fix me mommy, you can't!" he screams as I scratch him and cry. Or the little bit of hope he gets when we go to a new dr. , when he says, " this doc going to fix my itching!". Breaks my heart to know that his wish may not be fulfilled.

I am not a religious person and I'm no saint, but I have been praying hard lately. For my baby to heal, to have a normal, comfortable life, for my sanity....and well, I wonder, is god listening? How could such crap ass things happen to babies!! I get mad at god and beg for help, still nothing! Maybe it's easier for people with a real sense of faith to pray and beg and get nothing in return! Me, it makes me hate god a little bit. I know you are supposably only given as much as you can handle, but my baby shouldn't have to handle not being comfortable in his own skin, Wanting to rip it off of him. He shouldn't have a mom that has no patients for the endless hours of screaming at night. And that is why, I sometimes question god and wonder, are you actually listening? are you watching what my baby is going through? Why , oh , why, won't you help us? I would do anything to help Kline, god just show me the right answer!!!! I want to believe that god is good and kind and healing, come on god, bring it!!!!! We need it!!!!


So, because our detox is so intense and terrible, we are going on to full gaps and we may revisit intro later after we have done some healing. I hope to god, that this is the right step for us.....come on god, nooooo wammmmmies!!!!! Make me a believer again, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know that Kline is healthy compared to many babies out there, and I honestly have no idea how those brave families deal with their sick babies.....my heart goes out to all of them and hope too that god answers their prayers too!

One very depressed mama, Loren
Xoxoxooxoxox

Friday, March 23, 2012

Time does heal, right???

The night of day 13-14 was terrible...I got home from work at 3am, finally put my head on the pillow at 4am and Kline woke right up having a crazy itching fit. We were all up till 5:30 am itching and not being pleasant to each other...that's what a lack of sleep and a 2year old screaming for hours will do! Then another bad morning, of emotions, tantrums and itching. Finally, got out side for a walk with our friends, which is always good for moral! Kline's skin is looking really dry and scaly, hopefully these are signs of improvement!

My craving are terrible still....I so want to eat anything I see. Tomorrow night I have to work at
Plumpjack for a wedding banquet, not eating any of their amazing food and oh my god delish dessert is going to be torture! Wish me luck!

Lots of big adjustments here with the new job for all three of us.

Xoxoox Loren

Shameless!

So, hAve you seen the show "shameless"? Well, if you haven't you should. It is awesome. I have been feeling like a really crap ass mom lately, with all of my angry tantrums and emotional melt downs. But hey, at least I'm not stealing my kids money to buy uppers and cocaine and ditching my kids when things get rough! No, we may be in hell right now, but this is my hell and I am in for the long hall....till our hell becomes heaven!! Come on God please make it better soon!

So, if you are feeling like a crap ass parent like I am, watch shameless, it will make you look like June cleaver! Hey, at least I'm not a crack head.....no offense! ;-)

Ps. Day 14 sucked too!

Kline saw the ever so talented Michael Kerrigan , acupuncture and Chinese formula guru! He is putting Kline on a formula that he says will cure him eventually, but like everything else, we will have to be persistent and patient! Thank you Kerrigan for giving me hope!


http://www.michaelkerrigan.com/

Gotta go dust some desks!

Xoxoxoxo

Love, the crazy ass cleaning lady!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Homemade tooth paste really tastes like shit!

So today is our 14 th day, and people said it would be better by now! Ah, no! Not the case in our freak world! I am such a mess , I cried at kline's dr. Appointment with dr. Cathy Taylor the best dr. In truckee!!!! She really cares for her patients with all of her heart! And Jenna her assistant is amazing too!!!!

http://www.truckeechiropractic.com/about.html


Kline itches all night long, didn't sleep, was super itchy all day long and threw lots of tantrums.....we are just not happy at all and really need some relief soon. I don't know how so many people stay with gaps when the detox is so hard! We must be really f'ed up toxic people...ugh!

Anyway, I started my night job and I have never been so excited about cleaning toilets in my life!

One, it gives us another steady income.
2, we will get benefits.
And 3, I get to miss the night time freak out itch fest known as kline's bed time! Poor hubby, hasn't adjusted to well to it yet! Looks like we will all be sleep deprived and grumpy from now on!

So, I am hoping we are going to turn a corner soon, we have to, for our sanity, or for what little sanity we have left!

Night night, Loren xoxoxoxooox

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Squash is a real bitch to peel!




Day 11 was much better than day 1-10

And here it is, the end of day 12.....we made it through day 12 and still on stage 1.......we are staying on stage 1 longer since we have such bad die off and Kline is in such bad shape....and honestly I am an emotional mess!

We skyped with a gaps practitioner today and she has a lot of useful info!

Kline is such a mess...he is still up at almost 1 am itching. Today was my first day at the new job and let's just say my husband doesn't seem to chipper about him having to itch Kline all day instead of me. The practitioner said that Kline's skin will still probably get much worse before better! F***! We tried putting honey on him today under his wet dressing, aka pajama's which he hates! My hubby doesn't seem to be on board with the wet dressing since when I got home just now from work he was in totally dry, never been wet, nice comfy pj's......since I work 5 nights a week now, I guess wet pj's may not be happening. I understand that he hates them and throws a tantrum but I wish we could at least try it for a week!

The practitioner suggested putting honey, avo, and seaweed on his skin, switching every night.....and seaweed baths......sound so yummy....wish I was at sushi!

Oh man, at the work office there is so much processed food and candy, it was driving me crazy all night and I so wanted to devour it all.......the torture just hasn't let up yet.

Now, when Kline is sick of us itching him he says, " blow me, daddy!". Too freakin' funny, so we got the "eat me" aka itch me and now the "blow me".... My kid is so rude! ;-)

Well, I better run and take over the night shift on itching, petting and blowing! Ta ta!

Ps. I thought you would love to know that my roids are totally flaring up! Could be from all the detoxing, roid making, enemas I've been doing! ;)
Xoxoxxo
Loren

pps, a day 12 night sleep up date...he did not sleep!! no wet dressings seems to make his sleep way worse....maybe my hubby will try them tonight, hope so!

Sunday, March 18, 2012

videos of the crazies!!! days 4-9 stage 1

DAY 10 Stage 1!!!!

today is god awful, and i don't know why? I heard by 2 weeks it should get better. I am hoping I am not as insane by then!!!!!!~

I started taking pascalite clay to help with die off, so far nothing! and I have kline doing wet dressing now as suggested by another mama ,Emma Blue, who's baby is suffering like kline....you can check out her blog at http://yourbrainongaps.com/?p=87 ...thanks to my new friend!!!

here are some videos of the past few days of our whacked ass trip on the crazy gaps diets! I have to warn you, I am one crazy ass mo fo!

i have to go clean, xoxox loren

here is day 7 video...i tried all day to download other ones but the darn thing didn't work...will try again tomorrow!

Saturday, March 17, 2012

No, my son does not have leprosy!!!

Klines skin is bad, it is Open, flaking and oozing and people are noticing. Worried mom's are asking me, is that a rash or what? Like they are scared shit less that their kids are going to catch it! My poor baby! He is up most of the night itching still and he hates his mittens on his hands at night, throws a huge tantrum! The die off is hard, but I think his skin is starting to heal, I think!

We started baking soda baths last night and they seemed more soothing than Epsom...so I think I will stick with baking soda and seaweed bath. I am not really puting anything on his skin, because I really don't think anything helps!

We r still out of our home and at my friends house. We should be back in our home tonight....with new, no carpets full of allergens and dust mites, floors!! And tomorrow I plan on getting rid of everything, stuffed animals and nicknacks! The less to catch dust the better.

Day 7&8 of stage 1st were ok....still tons of itching and emotions! No one is really pooping normally..I miss my big old daily poops! ;) sorry! My face is breaking out with pimples. And I find that eating fats is really important to subdue die off. Still off probies but taking lots of fclo and our ferments.

I'll post some videos when we get to out home sweet home.....traveling on gaps sucks!!! Thank god, I have great friends and family!

Kline is eating a ton of meats, like 6hamburgers and 5chicken legs a day, and 4cups or so of frozen veggie bone broth pops! This definitely makes them good eater! He eats all day.
I personally am sick of savory foods!!!!

Gotta run, will post more later!

Ps. I am going to talk to a gaps practitioner out of washington, DC sometime next week to make sure we r on track!

Xoxoxo Loren

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

The itching hour, or should I say hours!!!!!!!

Well, the night from day 5 to day 6 was f'ed up!! We stayed at my mom's old cabin in Tahoe, because my husband is ripping out our carpet to help Kline get better! The house either had mold, or too much dust or dust mites, because Kline was the itchiest I have ever seen him ever!!! He was up and itching till 1am! I was insane and I don't think I have ever prayed so hard for a change and help. He finally fell asleep and the woke up 2hours late for another hour itching! It was the night from hell and I don't think we will ever stay at grammy's choo choo cabin again! Did I mention my mom has stuffed animals probably full of dust mite, hanging on all the walls of the cabin!


The rest of the day was much better and we are now staying at one of my best friends homes, thank Jackie, we love you!! It is now 11 pm and he just fell a sleep. He wasn't nearly as itchy but he has a huge tantrum over putting his gloves on...." I hate my gloves, mommy!". I am hoping he will sleep through the night. Hey, a girl an dream can't she?


He was so tired today, he fell a sleep on me at the Truckee kids museum. He has never done that before in his life.

Still no pooping for Kline, poor baby, that is 3days now......I sure hope it's soft when it does decide to pop its little brown head out!

Die off wise for Kline , no poopin', his joints and bones have been hurting, of course the major skin itching etc, his breath is stinky and, He is peeing a lot!!!!!!

My die off was better today, after going off the probiotics! Thank you Jesus! I was not nearly as crazy and I could function, wonderful news for everyone. Hope I don't have stinky breath like Kline?! Major craving....I really want cereal and a mint chocolate chip cliff builder bar, oh my god I love those, I could also go for a margarita and some chocolate cake....can you tell I have a huge sweet tooth? ;-/

It o so very hard to be moving around to different places to stay on gaps, I had to pack all of our foods, and I need some where with a full kitchen to make our meals. It looks like travel may be out for a while, boo hoo! We do have an rv which will be good since we can take our kitchen with us.

Kline loves the pops I have been making with winter squash and bone broth, I think he ate about 6 today along with 5 liver , beef, turkey burgers and 1&1/2 beef short ribs. it is crazy how much he is eating. Sure wish I could get him to take his fclo and bone broth, in time I guess.

We saw a beautiful rainbow today, so I do believe there is light at the end of this dark itchy tunnel! I also got a full time job with benefits, which is awesome...I've been out of work since dec. I will be working from 6 pm-2:30am, 5days a week, hope I can get used to the lack of sleep. Oh wait, I already don't get any sleep, mies well make some money instead of watching juicing videos on you tube till 2 in the morning!

Sleep well, gapians!
Xxoo Loren

Day 5 morning was the worst!!

I was literally crazy!! Kline didn't sleep last night and so neither did I! No sleep for years on end can really make a person batty! He woke up super early after going to bed super late, and I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open, I soooooooo needed a mocha!!!!!!!!!!

Then after a good 2hours of itching I started to get our broth and probiotics together( please note that I found out this afternoon, I shouldn't be giving or having those crazy mo fo's the probiotics, guess it make die off terrible, hmmmmmmmm I resemble that!) and I burned the shit out of my arm on bone broth! Watch out people this diet is dangerous!

Then I was trying to heat up kline's stew and I turned on the wrong burner and nearly caught the house on fire, smoke was everywhere. I think on stage 1 you have no brain function!

So we were supposed to go to Reno by 10am for a dr. Appointment, I was so out of it and crazy I had to cancel it......I actually didn't want to leave the house at all.

Once I ate some fatty chicken and drank a lemon water with salt, I was much better, and could actually function, somewhat.

Kline 's die off's were bad today, super itchy, bleeding/ oozing in many spots and all of his " bones" hurt. Poor baby! No pop today either, crap!

My die off was crazy emotions again, still not much poopin' going on. Also, my eyes feel like they have a ton of pressure behind them and I want to pop them out. And I seem super sensitive to sounds , seems like everyone is screaming. Also, my hands are super dry and scaly.


So, now we are at my mom's cabin at lake Tahoe because my husband is getting out dust mite carpet out of our house, hopefully we will only be here 2 night, I personally doubt that. Kline is not too happy About being here. Apparently he " don't like this place!"

hopefully tomorrow will be better! No prob's for us till maybe stage 3!!!!!

Good night from beautiful lake tahoe California! Xoxooxoo
Loren

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

You know you are on the gaps diet when you need dental floss at the dinner table!!!





Well, we made it through another day.....I was much better!! Kline was super itchy and aggravated today....his skin is inflamed all over......he even has scabs and eczema on the underside of his penis, poor baby!! He has never had it there before! I sure hope his die off goes fast.

I took him to his first chiropractor appointment today and he will go again Wednesday. Dr. Kathy said he was really out of wake and even his face was out of place, wow! His one eye is higher than the other...I always thought his ears were in different places but I thought that was just him! Goofy little guy! He took a nice long nap after.

Today, I cut out honey completely and only did the few veggies listed in the book. It sucked, I really wanted something sweet.....everywhere you look there is junk food, damn! Kline had a 3 Popsicle today....I know you're thinking , that can not be on gaps! Well, yes it is, he had 3 squash and bone broth Popsicle. He asked me what flavor it was and I just said, " yellow!" I didn't want to blow my secret.

We ate,
Bone broth, Kline still won't drink it!
Meatballs
Veggie mush "potatoes"
Fish
Kraut juice
Chicken legs
He even ate liver right before bed!
The 3 secret weapons pops
And dinosaur bones for dinner....we pretended we were cavemen and ate Dinosaur bone, aka beef short ribs! So cute!
Pretty good job today! I can't wait for my craving to leave!

Neither one of us poo'ed today.....that's 2 days for me, but who's counting? :) I didn't give Kline natural calm, so I hope that wasn't a mistake.

I decided to try another probiotic enema, since I didn't poo and I had a bad headache.....we'll I got all the water boiled and got it all ready and accidentally dropped some chicken stock in the water.....oops! I was not about to re boil the water and let it cool so I just went for it! Chicken broth and all. So, if I poop out a chick tomorrow I'll put it in the fridge for anal-ysis! ;0)

Kline took for ever to go to sleep tonight, soooo soooooo itchy! He finally was a sleep by 11:30pm..sure hope he sleeps tonight!

On to day #5

Love! Loren xoxoxoxoo

Ps. Did I tell you , klines chiropractor suggested we stay on each stage 3weeks, crap!

Monday, March 12, 2012

Day 3, stage 1...another crap day!



Kline and I slept till 11am, wintertime, so really noon!! He didn't go to bed till 11pm and was awake itching from3-5.... But we did get some good chunks of sleep, thank god!!!

Then Kline passed out, as I said before, turned blue and hit his head on the floor, scary!!! He forgets to breath while throwing tantrums, duh!!!!

I really don't want to eat any of these meat and veggie foods, so I am forcing myself! I think because I am cooking them all and know what's in them. Kline is eating great! I made honey candies, melt coconut oil with some honey and freeze, pretty yummy and great as a bribing tool.

Today I cooked all day...made kimchee ,? On spelling? Dill pickles, beef stew, and a fish broth soul with eggplant, spinach, and bok co ....not sure all of those veggies are on stage 1but I think they are??? It was not very good at all, I had to force myself to eat it, thank god I made 5gallons of it!!!!!!!!! Lol. Kline ate 2beef/liver patties for lunch and he loves the broc/cauliflower mush with bone broth...ate many bowls full!

Poop wise, Kline had 2soft poo's today, which never happens to him, he always has such huge hard poops. So that was fantastic! I on the other cheek,;-) no poo! Boo hoo! Hopefully tomorrow.

Die off is really bad for me right now....I am super stressed, depressed, impatient, and angry, makes me feel like the worst mom ever! I had to put myself in a time out twice today.
My face is also breaking out a little and I have a head ache right now, I probably should have take a detox bath!

Kline is super itchy as usual, but other than that not too many die offs...... :0)

This week he goes to a chiropractor, a rectal specialist, and his homeopathic dr. I think it should cost us about $300 bucks....and that's just the dr. Visit's, no treatments! Yikes! Sure hope they help him!

Well, tomorrow is day 4...... Wish us luck!!!! we'll need it!
Xoxoxox the crazy lady, Loren

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Day 2 sucked the big one!!!!

And day 3 is not looking much better!!!! the 1st thing Kline did on day 3,was pass out and bang his head on the rock tile....he was having a tantrum about what he wanted to eat!

Yesterday, day 2, was so bad, I was super angry and depressed all day, pretty much couldn't do anything with out crying about it or throwing a tantrum....I am not talk about Kline, people! I am talking about me, a grown 36 year old woman, throwing tantrums all day, r u kidding me? Then put Kline's tantrums and crazy itching on top of that, you can just imagine what our house looked like. Hell!!!!!!!!

We ate meatball soup, chicken legs, liver/beef hamburgers, fish, cauliflower/ broccoli mush, honey water with lemon, bone broth soups, boiled carrots, and h2o, fclo, probiotis's foods(kraut), and probiotic's in h2o................................all I wanted was chocolate!!!!

Kline is a very good eater, which I am thankful for! Hold on Kline wants to type some thing to you guys!

here goes~ kline says`
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkoooooooo
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
ddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
q rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr 33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333322222222222222222222222222222222222222222213
y

there you have it, the letters of our family and friends and how old he is and how old he will be! pretty good!!

I can imagine this would be even more stressful if my kid wasn't eating on top of all the detoxing!

kline's poops are soft, yeah!!! mine are mucus, gross!

this will get better!

I wish there was an exact list from Dr Campbell-McBride of what is allowed on each stage, because some people say coconut oil is OK others say no, some say tomatoes are OK, others say no........unfortunate no one says chocolate and a Starbucks mocha are OK, damn you alllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

here is a few video from yesterday!
hoping tomorrow is better! Loren
xoxxoxo




Saturday, March 10, 2012

We survived day 1 of intro!!!



Above is a picture of our cart at the grocery store for stage 1....pretty damn healthy!!!


Today at 1st Kline was pretty pissed off about starting gaps, and not eating fruits! See video below!!!

But then an hour later he got on board, kind of!! He ate meatballs for breakfast, a chicken leg for snack, fermented cod liver oil in bone broth, another chicken leg, squash soup with broccoli in it, meatball soup with probiotics in it, zucchini lasagna , chamomile tea, and lemon water with a little honey and natural calm to help him poop!!

He ate a lot, and a lot of balls.......I mean meatballs! ;)
He even drank his bone broths, nice!!!

He had one huge hard poop and one soft one, yeah!!!!!

Die off's , we both took a really long nap, I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open. Last night my body ached all over, like my nervous system was overwhelmed or something. Really weird! And I am having a bit of a hemeroids flare up, could be all the enemas! ;)

Kline's die offs seem pretty minimal, and since he is always so itch can't tell if that is from die off or not? Sure hope he sleeps through the night!

A cute and inappropriate Kline story!

Kline was playing with the tubing for my enema bag and I said," Kline don't play with that it goes up your butt!!" and he said, " mommy, put that up your butt, right now! " too funny!!

Night to all,

the douche bag,
Loren ;-) xxoo

Thursday, March 8, 2012

I bought some yummy organic coffee today. Sure wish I was drinking it instead of shoving it up my ass!

Sorry, I just had to go there!! Well, I may never look at a cup of coffee again! The coffee enema went well, I definitely feel cleaned out and pumped up, lol. The only problem is it is now after midnight and I feel like running a marathon. Maybe next time I'll try a decaf at night and a mocha in the morning!

Day 5of the juice feast, done!! Feeling good! I do hate that it is girl scout cookie season, every time I go to the grocery store their they are, tempting me! You suck girl scouts!!! Nah, just kidding, I gave them a donation Instead of taking those ,deadly , processed and completely yummy cookies home. Lost 5 lbs!!

Kline's skin is still sooooo bad! My husband describes it as, someone having poison oak/Ivy over 95 % of their body for months/years on end. Could you imagine? I think I would be a little ornery too.

We are almost done with fruits, only a little watermelon, blueberries, grapes , and 2apples left. He is eating great! He tried sauerkraut today and loved it , i think it will be hard to limit him eating that. I got him a new thermos to put his soup in and he was so excited he at a ton more of his stew just because he wanted to use it. ;)

He is pooping a massive amount, even with out a coffee enema. He has very hard almost impacted poops, (just like mine before i went off gluten 5 years ago) not sure if that is from all the banana's he has been eating or the new probiotic? But he holds it until he can't any more and man, it hurts so bad, I hope gaps will help our pooping issues.


Cute Kline story..... We went skiing at alpine meadows the other day, after shredding it up on the bunny slope, we went inside for lunch, I had some juice and Kline had "chachamole", aka, guacamole. ;). Daddy had a port of subs BBQ chicken sandwich. Let me tell you the smell was killing me! Kline said, "daddy, you have a fancy sandwich! It taste yummy?" Denny and I both felt so bad for the little guy. Then Denny said, "no, Kline it's not very good at all."..........liar! There will probably be many moments like this in the future....my son is such a trooper.


I can't imagine how parent survive having a child with a life threading disease. Kline's issue are often too much for me to handle. It is so heart breaking to see your baby in so much pain.

Love to all those with babies that suffer! I feel for you,
Loren

Xoxoxox.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

We just can't take it anymore!







we are starting gaps sooner than april 1st, I think on friday we will be on the intro stage 1!!! Kline's skin isn't getting any better, it is bleeding and oozing , no one is sleeping and we are crying way too much! So, I am only buying stage 1 foods as of now!! wish us luck and we will keep you posted!
thanks for all of the support and good thoughts! We need it!
xoxoxoxo loren

Day 6 of juice feast, going well,I am not hungry and the juices are going down easier!!! I am super mood and have little patients, even more than normal! ;-) I have lost 6 lbs and plan on doing a coffee enema soon! Oh, fun fun fun!!!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Hi, my names Loren, and I'm a turd hoarder!!


Hi, my names Loren and I'm a turd hoarder!!

Yep, that is right people, I have become a turd hoarder! Today my son took a huge man size crap and I had to put it in some tupperwear and put it in my fridge! Oh my god, there is something very wrong with poop being right next to all of our healthy bone broth organic free range soups and organic veggies and fruits. Yuck! Hope we don't all die from e-coli!!!
Ps. I have to collect his turds for 3days , refrigerate them qdn send them in the mail to a lad for anal...analysis! Hahahahha pun intended!

Kline eczema is starting to open up, maybe from all of his scratching, not sure. I feel so bad for him, his skin is bleeding! My friend Jackie who has had terrible eczema gave me some kind of liquid silver to out on the scratchy scabs, let's hope it helps!

Sleep tight,
Love, the turd birds!

Monday, March 5, 2012

Sir poops a lot!

This has a lot of tmi, in it...beware!!!

So, Campbell-mcbride, suggests You do enema's! I know, yum, right? Well, I thought I'd give it a go! I tried a probiotic enema and let me tell you it cleared me out!! It didn't hurt like I thought it would. I feel fine after everything was expelled! ;) I imagine everyone should try it at some point....my next adventure, the coffee enema!!! Yummy!


Kline's skin is still terrible and he has scratch marks all over his body from itching, my poor baby! I hope gaps and the holistic dr's give him some, we need it! He shredded up the ski slope today, now if he would just learn to stop! It was a beautiful tahoe day with great friends! I met 2 families that are doing gaps too, awesome support team!!

Night night, Loren

Day 3 on the juice feast down!! Not too bad at all.
Xoxoxoxo

Sunday, March 4, 2012

No Prozac, Help!!!

~here is a pix of kline at a few weeks old with his mittens on so he wouldn't itch himself. I didn't even know he had eczema at this point, just thought he gad a rash and was itchy.~

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Pate as a hair conditioner, I may be on to something good! ;)


picture of kale before I made kale chips!

Written on Friday march 2, 2012

I have never made pate before and never in a million years thought that I would! While making it the other day I got some in my hair and well, I was thinking if we aren't supposed to use hair products on the gaps diet, pate is actually a great conditioner!!! Give it a try, the next time you are cuisenarting your innards, smooth some into you hair! only down side, if you want to sell this product you won't be able to put "Vegan" on it! ;-)

Kline is doing ok pneumonia wise, but his skin is still so bad....I have still been giving him his anti histamine, using Epsom baths, olive oil on his skin and borage oil too....not sure anything is helping! So sad and so frustrating! I am almost tempted to start him on gaps earlier than I April 1st!!!!

He did great eating cauliflower mashed "potato's".... He pretty much ate a whole head by himself, so I figure worse comes to worse I give him that with broth in it as much as possible, since he isn't too into the soups or stews yet! He did drink some butternut squash soup with bone broth and innards in it, I had to bribe Him but oh well!

He loves the new juicer, he even drank a little tomato veggie juice tonight....wow! He loves helping me make the juice, it is actually really fun.

I am so proud of him. Today, we had to run into a gas station store to use the bathroom, he saw all the candy and didn't even say a word. Amazing, normally he would have been begging me to get him something....maybe he is going to be ok with out sugar! The real question is, will I?

I started a juice fast today, I was hoping to go for a while but we will see.....I added in bone broths, since they are so good for you anyway! I had to chug some of the more green and veggie drinks because they were gagging me! I am definitely a beginner juicer!!

If any of you have a favorite juicer recipe...please leave me a comment either here or on kline's facebook page.....

http://www.facebook.com/KlinesJourneyOnTheGapsDiet

Night night, don't let the itchy bed bugs bite!!
Xoxox loren

Friday, March 2, 2012

Klines 1st Homeopathic dr. Visit and a fantastic testimonial of gaps working for an autistic child!!



Sorry in advance for the venting, can you tell I am frustrated!~

Kline went to a homeopathic dr On wed and is going to another cranial sacrum dr today...? On spelling? The dr. Appointment was very informative and very expensive $275 and very over whelming!!!

We have to get water filters for kitchen, bath and shower...apparently our water has a ton of arsenic in it, how nice! How is it ok for the water companies to be able to sell us water with high levels of arsenic in it, isn't that illegal??? All i can think of is that old movie, arsenic and old lace, where they use arsenic to kill someone!!!! Not something I really want us to be drinking! Plus, we need to get the chlorine out of our water too.

We also have to get an air filter for klines bedroom, thank god one of my very best friends has one she doesn't use! Saves us about $500 bucks!!!

We also have to get an intense poop testing done, I have to collect his poo for 3 days and put it in our fridge, what the f***? And then send it to them in the mail, that should make the post man very happy! And to top it off it costs, $300 bucks!!!

Also, talked about all the treatments she would do with him in the future, naet being one of them. Acupressure, raki, and some kind of slow food introduction thing! I think she charges about 115$ a visit, gulp!!!

Today the cranial dr is about 125$ 1st visit and then 80$ after that!

Cha ching!

So why are we doing all of this homeopathic medicine stuff, this last year in medical bills, we spent over $13,000 in medical and we still owe at least $5,000....as my best friend yasuko would say, "what the bell?". And Kline is still sick, as you can see! I am frustrated and my husband about crapped his pants when he was doing out taxes! I feel like western medicine has just surprised his symptoms, not cured them, so we are trying other weirder and not convention things! Crap, I'd put leeches on him 5times a day and run around naked at Safeway, if that would cure him!!!

And of course, gaps! I am cooking away, studying away and going into this full force!!! I have hope that with homeopathic medicine and gaps, we will find an answer!!!!

Here is a fantastic testimonial from my friend over at the gaps yahoo groups, Reg about her son Elijah who was diagnosed with autism and severe candida over growth, there are so many stories like theirs about how well gaps works, especially for autism. I just wish all autistic families knew about gaps!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you Reg for sharing your story!

"Wow you guys I made it through the first year. Some days I thought I was going to surely die. My dog Zoe looks stress dealing with all the the screaming and die off around here.

I am here to tell you that this diet works. With the exception of die off Elijah looks and acts like a new child. I sit in my car sometimes and raise my hands to the Lord for sending us this diet and you guys

Here are some changes His hands no longer looks crippled. I believe the crippling hands came from malnutrition from his picky eating days

His stools are forming/less smelly

He's no longer a picky eater

He doesn't have frequent ear infections or colds anymore

He's no longer non verbal( He actually speaks using three word sentences, he ask questions, he names people, He told me yesterday that his teacher name is Mrs Downey and his friends are Ryan and Jaden

He displays affection, empathy and remorse

Food allergy is getting better. He is still pretty limited in his food
selections

Tantrums are gone( only when he has die off. Prior to the diet he had tantrums all day long

Hyperactivity is gone ( only with die off) Prior to the diet he had extreme hyperactivity. In fact this was his initial diagnosis

The stemming behavior is gone( only with die off doesn't last long though) Prior to this diet he did this all day long

Echolia is gone (only with die off not often anymore) Prior to this diet he did this constantly

Jargon usage are just about gone- Prior to this diet he did this all the time

Unexplained fits and angry outburst are gone- ( will surface with die off) Not as bad though. Praise the Lord

Inappropriate laughter is completely gone

Drunk type behavior is completely gone

Prior to this diet Elijah had extreme allergies and behavioral problem. I prayed constantly for this little guy. I thought he was going to be mentally ill. I thank the good Lord for Dr Natasha love and passion for our children and people with digestion difficulties.

Elijah was functioning at 12 months old when we started( he was
(2 1/2) now he is almost developing at three and in his cognitive skills he is functioning at 4 years old or older. He is 3 1/2. He still has a long way to go but I am so pleased with all of his progress.
Hugs
Reg/Eli"

Please share my blog with anyone you know that has a family member with autism!!! There as so many stories just like this!!!!! Spread the word and bring an autistic child out of their shell!!
Thank you all, Loren
Xoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxxoxoxxx

If you'd Like, like klines facebook page!!

http://www.facebook.com/KlinesJourneyOnTheGapsDiet